TOTALLY ADDICTED TO...

- downloading apps and pretending that my i-touch is actually an i-phone (i want one soooo bad now!)

- twittering and tumbling (or is it tumbring?)

- i am also amused at the fact that i post regularly on twitter and tumblr as if i have a giant following LMAO

you know where to find me ^_^

MUSIQ SOULCHILD - ANYTHING...

this dude can do me no wrong. still haven't quite forgiven swizzy & miss keys yet but i'm slowly coming around lolz

YODA'S WISDOM...

..is the idea of emptying your cup. There is an old story of a Japanese master who received a university professor who came inquiring about the meaning of Zen. First the master served him tea. The master poured his visitor's cup full, and then kept on pouring. The visitor watched the overflowing cup until he could no longer restrain himself. "It is overfull. No more will go in!" the professor shouted. "Like this cup," the master replied, "you are full of your own opinions and speculations. How can I show you Zen unless you first empty your cup?" Indeed, if we approach life with a full cup, we can not learn anything new. New skills, new approaches, and different ways of thinking will be blocked. Wild ideas, crazy notions, and remarkable insights will have no space to enter our world of certainty, pride, and (over) confidence. Part of emptying our cup is a willingness to unlearn what we have learned.

"My friend, drop all your preconceived and fixed ideas and be neutral. Do you know why this cup is useful? Because it is empty." - Bruce Lee

i just recieved an email and basically got told to stop wallowing lolz

.. it's not enough to start the race, you've got to finish it .. u'll be fine .. u've not time to sit and question why u're here .. your question shud be how shud I get out of here ..

sometimes if you just reach out & talk alot of [un-editited] shit, someone else digests what you're tryna say and gives you back diamonds like this.

thank you. i love you family! mwah xo

IT'S BEEN TOO LONG...

i've had alot of shit to blog about lately! so what's my excuse for not blogging? my macbook pro is slowly crapping out and dying on me so i've unable to access the net, let alone my beloved laptop for my usual mindless rant.

the 60 second wrap up:

- massive earthquake in christchurch (my family was all good. cousin recently txt to say the power was back on, but still no water)

- started back at uni (which has me questioning myself.. "why the fuck am i doing this again?")

- went home to catch up and hang out with the BCK (bavi cool kids). didn't realise how much being a 'grown up' sucks. wish we could have bonfires & listen to radiohead every weekend. (perhaps switch it up by adding a little kanye in there? hahaha)

- got hit on by a hot guy at footlocker. ya girl's still got it! hahaha (except the part where he started talking about his 21st this year.. mmmmmmm..)

- started back to twitter. why do i insist on trying to live my life like a celebrity and tweet everything i'm doing? people really don't give a fuck about me or my status updates.


- awaiting bloods. may have to go back to get them done again because i didn't realise "fasting" was only a 10hr stint.

- direction. do you have some? coz i could sure do with it. i know i popped off at the friendboy for questioning my intentions of returning to uni, but i think he uncovered the fact that part of me is only going back because i'm not sure what to do with myself.

- post-grads. this years in-take = fucktards to an extreme level. (not the highest level, just a really extreme level.) please don't look at me that way when i openly admit that i am repeating this paper.

- sunsilk. that shit is doing wonders for my hair right now.

- haven't been here in awhile. and you can tell. i don't know what the first sign is, but i know my undies being too tight is a very bad one.

- bff's wedding in nov. maid of honour has been fired and is not even in the line anymore! haha (it's her sister and i'm betting she'll be reinstated by november.) *watch this space* for more news/dramas.

ok so this really wasn't a 60 second wrap up.. but there you go, consider yourself filled in.

peace and i'm out.

i-WANT...

this t-shirt for valentines day... *sigh*

WELLINGTON SEVENS 2011

why did i not think of these costumes? they are BRILLIANT! hahahaha i have made a vow to go to the sevens next year seeing as they actually will be in wellington again. i can admit to being wrong, but i can't apologise for saying fuck you auckland. that still stands. the brainstorm for costumes has begun.. what to wear? anywho, halloween will be a perfect time to test it out ^_^

FUCK YOU AUCKLAND...

for stealing the WELLINGTON sevens next year.

kudos to the dude waving his flag and yelling I LOVE YOU SAMOA! in amongst all the suits in civic square.

OH BABY!

viewed the child today. in my personal opinion it looked like ET but i didn't dare tell the parents. i felt very emotional seeing their family unit. (the emotion was happiness for my friend). the visit was too much for the friend-boy who did very well to hide the fact he was absolutely shell shocked at the 'grown-upness' of it all. hmmm.

THE WAITING GAME...

we went straight out to hutt hospital after work today to visit one of my girls who went into labour. i must say that hutt hospital maternity wards waiting room is shit. its not even a room, it a corridoor! (straight up). she was planning a natural birth but apparently she had to have a c-section. after waiting for 3hrs, my ride out to the hutt grew restless and wanted to head back into the city so i didn't get to my dear friend and the new kid on the block. i am determined to view the child though, so friendboy offered to drive me out tomorrow to have a look-see.

COOL SHIT I OWN...

i got bored one night when i was back home & bejeweled my sennheiser headphones. which may i add have since died (fuck you).

i forgot to tell of my christmas presents from the friendboy. he bought me a 1 tb external hard driver and also a 500 mb one that i tried to bejewel buuuuuut ran out so it looks a tad lame-o.

I'LL PENCIL YOU IN...

JANUARY

- is nearly over... i guess i did come back to nz from samoa.

FEBRUARY

- wellington sevens

- valentines day.. except we're not celebrating because he has an exam on the 14th.

- planned bavi reunion?

- memorial at home for a school friend who took something at a party and never woke up.

MARCH

- first cousins 21st

- friendboy promised little brother to fly him down to wellington for his 10th birthday and take him to the zoo.

- youngest sister turns 19 and moves to waikato for uni.

- friendboy's mum celebrates her 50th

- our canadian flatemate moves out and leaves the country because his visa expires

- i start back at uni to re-do that bloody numeracy paper

- usher and trey songz concert in auckland... oh wait that's right! they've postponed it, and we have to re-book all our flights.

APRIL

- usher and trey songz concert (if they don't bloody postpone again.. or CANCEL!)

- mumzy's birthday

- didn't j.c die or something.. is it easter?

MAY

- aunty on mumzy's side celebrates her 50th

- friendboy graduates

JUNE


- queens birthday is free for the time being

- one of the bff's turns 25

JULY

- *blank stare*

AUGUST

- contract runs out at work which i will not be re-newing

- 7 week teaching experience if i pass that damn paper

SEPTEMBER

- *another blank stare*

OCTOBER

- father bears birthday

- friend boys birthday

- bff's supposed hens/stag cocktail party in auckland (that i'm meant to plan?!)


NOVEMBER

- bff comes back to the country from london

- other bff gets married (hence bff coming from london town)

- nana's birthday

- final exams

DECEMBER

- father bears sister celebrates her 50th

- i think j.c was born.. is it christmas? am planning to spend it back home

- new years.. fun and games pretending to plan something super exciting like everyone else, but to be frank i just don't do new years.

FUN & GAMES...

two things construction are not when it's right outside you're front door.

LIFES SIMPLE PLEASURES...

= my USF hoody and my new sweet tart coloured nails

TYPO...

so this is officially my new favourite store in palmerston north.

i was not a huge fan of smiggles when it first came out (and i'm still not feeling it).

i stumbled across this little store in the plaza last time i went home because the friend boy was asking what sally ridge (or is it sally parore now?) anywho, what her store was called. i was like, "james&august is her undie/pj label. the store never opened in palmy though."

then he explained they'd gone into receivership & then wanted to know what store went into where it was meant to open, which i didn't know the answer to. now i do. it's typo. the bestest store in the world. (that is a slight exaggeration of course).

i bought some pens (because you can never have enough of that shit), some enlightening cards, (haha) and paper clips to send to my aunty in samoa to make her day a little brighter (because her staff are retards). not only do i heart stationery but i heart packaging too, so the pouch the pens came in, and then the paper bag it all was put into that ties up with twine was the cherry on top for me.

you should go there. not only because i said so, but because it's awesome.

the end.

SMALL JEALOUS...

of my boyfriend's determination of teaching himself how to code so that he can create his own website. he is now on to learning the ins and outs of photoshop and dreamweaver. i was attracted to him for the very fact that he is very smart. it now makes me want to punch him in the face for being better and knowing more than i do about the things i apparently have a degree in. good times just keep on rolling.

MERRY CHRISTMAS FROM METLINK..

transport might be a bit shit at the best of times but i thought this was a cool merry christmas ad for metlink when i walked past to my bus stop after work one night.

ROMANS REVENGE FT. WEEZY...

oh me, oh my! there was once a time that i could not stand this chick, but she has taken me over! lolz just like conceptual art, i totally didn't get her at first & thought she was just one of those 'ghetto rap chicks'.. i was so wrong. nicki minaj is straight up dangerous when she spits on the mic!

one of my fave tracks from her album pink friday called romans revenge has recently been given a make-over by lil' wayne. check it out!

COOL SHIT I FOUND AT THE WAREHOUSE BACK HOME..

transformers cd case. i totally would've gotten one if it held more than 2 cds.

YES, I AM..

yes, i am in a lull.

yes, i am creating distance between us.

yes, i am sulking.

yes, i am not listening to you justify your reasons for saying it.

yes i am confused as to which direction we are now headed (thought your apparent explanation was mean to clear the whole thing up, make it all better, and make it all go away.

yes, i may have even let this cross my own mind waaaay at the beginning.

but it was YOU who planted the seed which has now spread like vicious poison inside me.

i said it had once crossed my mind. but i never actually verbalised it. hello! have you not read the secret?

THOUGHTS BECOME THINGS.

LIKE ATTRACTS LIKE.

you are the one who has put it "into the universe". so if it falls apart, it's all on you.
you decided to make your bed. now fucken lie in it.

there is no way that anyone is going to have an epiphany and realise that they are 'young' and perhaps the 'want to go overseas' (that's my dream asshole), and perhaps 'at the end of this year we need to re-evaluate where we are' and 'take a break' .

when all that bull shit was pouring out of your mouth what i really wanted to say was FUCK YOU. followed by FUCK OFF. nobody takes a fucken break from me!

instead, i actually considered it (i know like, wtf?) and then i took into consideration that he was quite intoxicated (shouldn't be an excuse though).

a hundred or nothing. that used to be your motto. what happened?

thank you so so much for making me feel like the last 19 months were a complete joke to you and a waste of my time and effort after all that we've been though.

i was very serious about the fact that what you said will (and already has) make me slack off. seriously, why bother if you've voiced your thoughts on a possible break? once again FUCK YOU.

now you listen and you listen good. FIX IT. don't just say you're 'sorry' because you 'didn't mean it like that'. you're always fucken sorry. i've even told you that i'm sick of hearing that you're sorry 'coz you say it so much. start SHOWING IT. show me how sorry you are. SHOW ME that you didn't mean it like that.

i miss you. well, i did. or maybe i still do? it's hard to tell. i'm slacking off and kind of giving up little by little on "us".

WEEKEND WRAP UP... (THE GOOD BAD & UGLY)

G - sunshine this week
B - usually being stuck inside
U - getting slightly burnt yesterday

G - kapahaka at school coming along nicely
B - trying to set an example of how the dance should be done
U - my quads STILL being so fuckn painful from friday (i can barely walk or not swear between the transition of sitting & standing)

G - only working 2 days at the bank this week
B - most probably having to make up all the lost time
U - everyone at works pay day

G - working 24-7 to make money
B - working 24-7 taking its toll on our relationship
U - arguing over stupid shit & hurting each other

G - realising working 24-7 isn't working for us
B - not living as frivolously as i once did
U - nothing really

G -going to samoa soon!!
B - realising some family members are actually low-key psycho
U - all the dramas that entail & could possibly put a damper on my holiday fml